Boy I hate it when I have to come back and severely edit a post. Ohhhhhh. Wow.
Anyway I started by saying that...
Farm Boy got a phone call the other night. Someone had issues. Thought they'd been left out of the loop. Felt there was information they should have been privy to, and when they didn't get the full scoop they considered it vote of 'lack of confidence'. They were ready to fold their tent and get the heck out of Dodge.
Farm Boy wasn't quite sure what to do and hands the phone off to me, telling our caller that I can fill him in on the situation better than he can.
????
Let's be clear...this was not a teenager. It was a mature person who had been given a calling. It was a delicate situation but his main duty was just to be there, act normal and help with whatever, whenever it was requested...
As I tried to explain the condensed story he just wasn't feeling it.
The core of my comments were a call to compassion, understanding and service. A gently held carrot coaxing a recalcitrant horse through the gate. An extension of all my feminine wiles to placate a man's wounded vanity. It's the same story/scenario which has been repeated between the sexes since the dawn of time. A diplomatic masterpiece that would have been much more satisfying welded as a baseball bat. However there were other people to consider so diplomacy was the weapon of choice.
I ended the conversation by reminding this man how much I valued his friendship and how much I cared for him.
You know what he said?
"Yes, I know you do. But it isn't enough."
And then he hung up.
...
You know, there are a lot of people who need help and fellowship. We've been told to lengthen our stride and we should, but, the fact is that we're not going to be able to be everything for everyone.
Sometimes I find I've over scheduled myself...and unfortunately that means that I'm probably not doing any one thing REALLY well, but I keep stumbling on anyway, doing the best I can at the moment.
You know, I used to watch my father beat the crap out of my mother. I definitely grew up with a bad attitude about the "Me Tarzan, You Jane," I've got to be in charge at all cost, types.
As for "our friend," you know, the "it's all about me" guy...
Oh, Deep, Cleansing. Breaths.
Don't know what to say. Except, thanks for hanging up. An age old frustration burns and I'm left with the final assessment of:
Ego...thy name is MAN.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Friday, February 25, 2011
Make A Plan & Work It
I have a co-worker. Sweet woman, seriously, but...
She has a tendency to meet us at the door on days that the work load is heavy and greet us with a 'doom and gloom' thing. Going on six years now and she's just now finally realizing that I'd rather not be met with the equivalent of "Welcome to your piece of crap day!!!!"
I don't know anyone who likes to be dumped on, but it happens, yes? So when I walk to my station/case it usually only takes seconds to size up the situation, and...
light,
heavy,
or
"oh heck, what the ???"
It is what it is.
Then I set to, and try to get 'er done.
I'd like to say that I handle all challenges with great dignity and aplomb. But...no. I have my moments. I've been surprised on occasion, badly a time or two. But I've never given up, yet.
Okay, there are a couple of issues that I just haven't dealt with...and yes, when that happens, I pretty much opened up a closet, chuck IT inside, slam the door and lock it, and having no brilliant ideas on what else to do about it...leave. For the rest of it, my mantra is pretty much..."Suck it up, buttercup." Then the shoulder gets thrown to the wheel and on I go.
There are some people I know, however, who grind to a stop on a regular basis. The road blocks life throws in their way bring them to a complete halt.
I was reading the book Rhineland Inheritance by T. Davis Bunn. While not heavy, philosophical reading I found it interesting because it described the destruction of German cities following WWII. (Especially interesting for those of us searching for German genealogy records.) My great grandfather and most of his family were in Germany during the war. Times were hard. His daughter, my grandmother, sent packages with supplies and food as often as she could from America. The book tells of the aftermath of the war and the roving bands of homeless children who were orphaned or abandoned because there was no way for the parents to care for them. The army staff tasked to deal with the situation were often stressed because no matter what they did to assist it was never enough. The author noted that when dealing with death and destruction there is sorrow everywhere. He suggested, through the character of the Army Chaplin, that there are three basic choices we have when dealing with it.
1) You can let it overwhelm you, and if you do it can drive you around the bend.
2) You can lock yourself away. This is what a majority of people choose to do. Sometimes they simply refuse to deal with life, they are imprisoned within themselves. Others only allow themselves to tend to their own hunger. Still others see nothing but their own pain or hate. Because they are blinded by their own will, they view their own pain and anger as justification for other's suffering.
3) The last choice is to learn to take each day as it comes, and to do what you can with what you have. This means learning that you cannot avoid seeing the suffering of others, which is hard. I would imagine that it would be impossible to do this without the strength of God in your heart. At least a believer can respond to this suffering with prayer. But the key is to learn to do with what you have. Do not see yourself as a failure because you can't touch all who suffer. Recognize that universal healing can only come through Jesus Christ, and accept your assigned task. Then do all you can with everything you've been given.
Life has its moments of unsurpassed beauty. It also has it moments of soul crushing pain. Our job is to go onward. Some of my favorite lines of poetry come from Robert Frost's Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening:
The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
It's okay to stop and catch your breath, or admire the view. But whether the end of the day or the end of our years here on earth, we all have miles to go, good works to do, people who need our help. IT is not about "me".
Best get going, eh?
-
She has a tendency to meet us at the door on days that the work load is heavy and greet us with a 'doom and gloom' thing. Going on six years now and she's just now finally realizing that I'd rather not be met with the equivalent of "Welcome to your piece of crap day!!!!"
I don't know anyone who likes to be dumped on, but it happens, yes? So when I walk to my station/case it usually only takes seconds to size up the situation, and...
light,
heavy,
or
"oh heck, what the ???"
It is what it is.
Then I set to, and try to get 'er done.
I'd like to say that I handle all challenges with great dignity and aplomb. But...no. I have my moments. I've been surprised on occasion, badly a time or two. But I've never given up, yet.
Okay, there are a couple of issues that I just haven't dealt with...and yes, when that happens, I pretty much opened up a closet, chuck IT inside, slam the door and lock it, and having no brilliant ideas on what else to do about it...leave. For the rest of it, my mantra is pretty much..."Suck it up, buttercup." Then the shoulder gets thrown to the wheel and on I go.
There are some people I know, however, who grind to a stop on a regular basis. The road blocks life throws in their way bring them to a complete halt.
I was reading the book Rhineland Inheritance by T. Davis Bunn. While not heavy, philosophical reading I found it interesting because it described the destruction of German cities following WWII. (Especially interesting for those of us searching for German genealogy records.) My great grandfather and most of his family were in Germany during the war. Times were hard. His daughter, my grandmother, sent packages with supplies and food as often as she could from America. The book tells of the aftermath of the war and the roving bands of homeless children who were orphaned or abandoned because there was no way for the parents to care for them. The army staff tasked to deal with the situation were often stressed because no matter what they did to assist it was never enough. The author noted that when dealing with death and destruction there is sorrow everywhere. He suggested, through the character of the Army Chaplin, that there are three basic choices we have when dealing with it.
1) You can let it overwhelm you, and if you do it can drive you around the bend.
2) You can lock yourself away. This is what a majority of people choose to do. Sometimes they simply refuse to deal with life, they are imprisoned within themselves. Others only allow themselves to tend to their own hunger. Still others see nothing but their own pain or hate. Because they are blinded by their own will, they view their own pain and anger as justification for other's suffering.
3) The last choice is to learn to take each day as it comes, and to do what you can with what you have. This means learning that you cannot avoid seeing the suffering of others, which is hard. I would imagine that it would be impossible to do this without the strength of God in your heart. At least a believer can respond to this suffering with prayer. But the key is to learn to do with what you have. Do not see yourself as a failure because you can't touch all who suffer. Recognize that universal healing can only come through Jesus Christ, and accept your assigned task. Then do all you can with everything you've been given.
Life has its moments of unsurpassed beauty. It also has it moments of soul crushing pain. Our job is to go onward. Some of my favorite lines of poetry come from Robert Frost's Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening:
The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
It's okay to stop and catch your breath, or admire the view. But whether the end of the day or the end of our years here on earth, we all have miles to go, good works to do, people who need our help. IT is not about "me".
Best get going, eh?
-
Friday, January 21, 2011
Thursday, January 20, 2011
On The Road Again
Don't want the kid on the bus, getting his arm jostled, so I'm off, to go pick him up.
Headed down the highway. I've set the cruise control at 61/62 mph. Just as I go under the Lewis Street overpass I see an unmarked State Patrol car sitting on the side of the road.
Five cars ahead of me suddenly get religion & hit the brakes. The group collectively slows to 55.
Guys?
Guys? Speed limit is 60? Could you, would you? As I start to sail into the pack...
Ahhh, never mind. I hit the decel button and, I too, slow to 55 to avoid rear ended the paranoid schizoid in front of me.
The trooper has to be having fun watching everyone freak.
Gotta love the herd mentality.
-
Headed down the highway. I've set the cruise control at 61/62 mph. Just as I go under the Lewis Street overpass I see an unmarked State Patrol car sitting on the side of the road.
Five cars ahead of me suddenly get religion & hit the brakes. The group collectively slows to 55.
Guys?
Guys? Speed limit is 60? Could you, would you? As I start to sail into the pack...
Ahhh, never mind. I hit the decel button and, I too, slow to 55 to avoid rear ended the paranoid schizoid in front of me.
The trooper has to be having fun watching everyone freak.
Gotta love the herd mentality.
-
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Let's Tear Off All Our Clothes And Run Screaming, Naked Down The Street
"I didn't say that." He declares staunchly.
Ummmm. Okay. Listen to this.
"Yah. It's okay!"
Then try this.
"Yahhhh. It's - okay...."
The first would be taken to mean: It is fine.
The second could denote a variety of things, but the reluctance is obvious. The correct words are there but the tone implies that while it may be tolerable, you're not guaranteeing you won't puke on someones shoes afterwards...
See?
A world of difference. So please stop making excuses. Okay, I'll concede. That may be what you said...but it is NOT what you meant!
No, no, really - no more excuses. You may stop talking now.
-
Ummmm. Okay. Listen to this.
"Yah. It's okay!"
Then try this.
"Yahhhh. It's - okay...."
The first would be taken to mean: It is fine.
The second could denote a variety of things, but the reluctance is obvious. The correct words are there but the tone implies that while it may be tolerable, you're not guaranteeing you won't puke on someones shoes afterwards...
See?
A world of difference. So please stop making excuses. Okay, I'll concede. That may be what you said...but it is NOT what you meant!
No, no, really - no more excuses. You may stop talking now.
-
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Monday, January 17, 2011
NOT On The List of Helpful Things To Do
The Youngest broke his arm.
Jan 1.
Again.
Helllllooo 2011.
Had surgery on Jan. 10, put a plate in/on it. Now he gets matching scars, one on the left arm, one on the right arm.
Goodie!
Sent him back to school Thurs. It was a bit much so he stayed home on Fri. At least he got his homework. And so we try to play catch up. He's off the pain pills and has some clarity about him.
He's done a lot better this year and this last quarter had all A's & B's ...except for Spanish. I don't know. Maybe his schedule was just too tight. He has 7 classes plus release time seminary. He was on the swim team and spent quite a bit of time after school with his sports broadcasting class which filmed a lot of the home football, volleyball & basketball games. So maybe it was just too much.
Anyway, Spanish sucks.
Big time.
So we're looking at what he has to make up. There is an interactive lesson site on the Internet. He has a microphone to do the practice speaking sessions and he just doesn't get it. He is too far behind.
Enter Farm Boy. There is no school today because of Martin Luther King Day but Farm Boy has to go to work. No holiday for him. However, before he leaves this morning he is VERY DEFINITE...If The Youngest has not finished his Spanish homework, he announces, he will not take him to school tomorrow. He will not allow him to go back until it is all completed. End of discussion.
????
Wow. Large & in charge.
Gotta love it when dumb meets dumber.
Let's review.
The kid has missed a total of 9 days of school. Semester finals are this week on Thurs. & Fri. Said kid, has just had major surgery. While he has tried to do the work we've brought home for him he has been in pain & medicated. He needs help catching up and will have to cram as many reviews as possible on Tues & Wed. in order to have a snowball's chance on the finals.
Spanish is a wash. The class will have to be dropped and he'll just have to try again next year. Farm Boy & I have discussed this.
But this morning...
Ah yes, the ultimate solution. He's behind, so let's hold him out of school so he can get further behind.
Sigh.
Okay, seriously not happening. He will go to school.
But...just because I had to listen to that noise...can somebody, anybody?
Explain the thought process behind that?
-
Jan 1.
Again.
Helllllooo 2011.
Had surgery on Jan. 10, put a plate in/on it. Now he gets matching scars, one on the left arm, one on the right arm.
Goodie!
Sent him back to school Thurs. It was a bit much so he stayed home on Fri. At least he got his homework. And so we try to play catch up. He's off the pain pills and has some clarity about him.
He's done a lot better this year and this last quarter had all A's & B's ...except for Spanish. I don't know. Maybe his schedule was just too tight. He has 7 classes plus release time seminary. He was on the swim team and spent quite a bit of time after school with his sports broadcasting class which filmed a lot of the home football, volleyball & basketball games. So maybe it was just too much.
Anyway, Spanish sucks.
Big time.
So we're looking at what he has to make up. There is an interactive lesson site on the Internet. He has a microphone to do the practice speaking sessions and he just doesn't get it. He is too far behind.
Enter Farm Boy. There is no school today because of Martin Luther King Day but Farm Boy has to go to work. No holiday for him. However, before he leaves this morning he is VERY DEFINITE...If The Youngest has not finished his Spanish homework, he announces, he will not take him to school tomorrow. He will not allow him to go back until it is all completed. End of discussion.
????
Wow. Large & in charge.
Gotta love it when dumb meets dumber.
Let's review.
The kid has missed a total of 9 days of school. Semester finals are this week on Thurs. & Fri. Said kid, has just had major surgery. While he has tried to do the work we've brought home for him he has been in pain & medicated. He needs help catching up and will have to cram as many reviews as possible on Tues & Wed. in order to have a snowball's chance on the finals.
Spanish is a wash. The class will have to be dropped and he'll just have to try again next year. Farm Boy & I have discussed this.
But this morning...
Ah yes, the ultimate solution. He's behind, so let's hold him out of school so he can get further behind.
Sigh.
Okay, seriously not happening. He will go to school.
But...just because I had to listen to that noise...can somebody, anybody?
Explain the thought process behind that?
-
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)